Exclusive: Club President's email account hacked (allegedly)

Now there is absolutely no proof to support this claim but as they say, there is no smoke without fire. In his absence Miles Ede volunteered to go in goals, but we were all grateful to discover that Rich Miller (now known as the Late Rich Miller, to differentiate from the other one) had turned up before Miles was able to work out how to get the spare Uni kit on.

We managed to keep possession for the first 10 minutes then the Uni broke through and scored. This resulted in not only a goal but also a green card for Derek Bell for a slightly desperate last ditch tackle. This turned out to be a case of identity fraud once McCreigh-Smith been been proven to be the real culprit.

Back to full strength we started to dominate with Donny Hay running around like an excited puppy. He was ably accompanied by Greg Browne on the right wrong and debutante Ross Taylor up front while Leo Johnson made a number of strong, well timed tackles at the back. Despite this we were unable to draw level before the break, 1-0 down at half time.

Undeterred by our early setback we continued to put the Uni under pressure and it was not long before we won a corner. Now to be fair, so far this season getting corners has not been a great advantage to us, however this one was destined to be different. An amazing option—never been seen before on a hockey pitch—saw the ball rolled (slowly) to Browne who trickled the ball into the net. The only possible explanation is that the defence assumed the ball was going so slowly the rotation of the earth would prevent it going into the net. Just goes to show how litle students are taught these days.

Our second goal was much more convincing. A bit of magic between Hay and Browne ended up with Taylor taking a quick shot on the turn and finding the back of the net. We were in the lead against one of the best sides in the league, how did that happen?

There was a certain amount of controversy over the Uni equaliser, with a bit of a stramash in the circle ending up with the "Late Rich Miller" confronting his attacker, sorry, "an" attacker. After a short discussion between the umpires it was decided he had reacted a little bit badly to a slap across his pads and a Penalty Flick was awarded. We watched the ball roll agonisingly slowly into the corner with our keeper wrong footed. 2-2.

Despite this setback we bounced back and a period of sustained pressure saw Browne score with a rocket that gave the keeper absolutely nay chance.

The Uni pressed us until the end but we held out, fundamentally through a lot of hard work all over the pitch. Next week Kinross, and a chance to move up the table.